Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

P.S. By the way (which is kind of redundant to say considering I started out with "P.S."), I got a haircut. And by "got" I mean I cut it off myself, which if you know me, you already knew that's what I meant anyway.

Husband says I look like a news anchor/reporter. I'd like to hear you weigh in- I report, you decide (ha ha a little Fox News humor for those of you who watch it).

Read More

Our baby boy...we think.

Husband and I have a long-standing theory that either (a) we are going to have really cute offspring or (b) we are going to have really not-so-cute (to put it nicely) offspring.

We only say this because we are two people who have completely different features from one another. I have an oval shaped face, he has a squarish-but not really square face, I have light hair, he has dark, I have big blue eyes (normal eyes) and he has not-so-big GREEN eyes (some might say squinty), etc. And everyone knows that if you have two people with completely different features, their kids always turn out on one of the extreme sides. So to finally put this cute or not-cute kids question to rest, I did what any curious person would do- I morphed our faces together on morphthing.com and well, you can decide for yourself. As far as what we think- we just hope the picture is meant to be a representation of if we had a boy, ha ha.

ADDED TO POST:

After looking again, we think our kid looks oddly familiar- like our nephew, Parker, perhaps? You decide.

PS: If you're wondering why our kid has gray hair, the picture I used for Husband's morph was in black and white.

Read More

Funny Story... (and no time for clever titles)

I finish reading a story to Husband and laugh hysterically.

Husband looks back at me with no emotion.

Me: "How do you not think that was funny??!"

Husband: "Because it just wasn't funny."

Me: "That was hilarious!"

I proceed to dramatically explain to him the humor in the story.

Husband smiles as I re-hash the details.

Me: "Isn't that funny??!"

Husband: "No."

Me: "I feel sorry for you because you can't see humor in the small things."

Husband: "I can see humor in the small things, I just don't think it was funny."

Me: "You were smiling which means you do think it was somewhat funny."

Husband: "No, I think you're funny."

Me: "So I would make a good story?"

Husband: "No. I think you are the kind of funny people have to watch to think is funny."

Me: "So you think I would make a funny show? You think I would be a good reality show?"

Husband: "Not a reality show necessarily. I just think you're the kind of funny that someone would have to marry to become your husband, and then watch you as your husband to think you're funny."

Me: "That's not funny."

Please note that Husband did not think this story was funny or blog worthy. But if you smiled or laughed or just thought part of it was funny, I believe it was worth blogging about and think you should comment on it.

If you didn't think it was funny, you probably just had to be there- ha ha ha ha ha ha. I crack myself up.

(PS: Check out my awesome labels for this post)

Read More

Ahhh Love....

Random Wedding Guests: "So, when did you two get married?"

Husband: "July 24th?" looking at me.

Me: "July 27th?" looking at him.

Husband: "July 24th." Sure as can be.

Me: "Hmmm... I'm not sure. July twentieth something." Looking back at the guest, still unsure.

Husband: "July 24th." Looking back at the guest, really confident.

Me: "I guess July 24th." Giving in.

Random Wedding Guests: "Huh."

I'm still not really sure when our anniversary is, but I know it's next month and this was the first time we had really remembered it was coming up. Ahhh love....

Read More

Husbands should come with warning labels...

I have a migraine today, and what does any good husband do when their wife has a migraine? They ask what they can do to help. 

"I just want you to suck the migraine out of my head," I said while taking his hand, placing his palm on my forehead and applying minimal pressure. "I just want you to use your powers to get rid of it, like those religious people on tv do."

What does your husband do when you ask him to suck the migraine out of your head?

He literally sucks your head and gives you one of these on your forehead:

What does your wife do after discovering her husband left a hickey on her forehead (that probably won't go away in time for working the morning)?

She puts on her angry face (while he puts on his "Oh Crap, she is going to kill me" face) and she sends him out to buy her Subway to make up for it (since she can't go out in public anymore!) and then laughs hysterically once he has left. 

PS: It would figure that the one time I actually take a decient picture, it would be the time I have a giant hickey on my forehead. 

Read More

Story Time (No Picture Book Though, Sorry)

Sometimes, I get the itch to write, but have nothing to write about and so I visit a wonderful little place at writersdigest.com that provides people with writing prompts (like your teachers did in middle school) and then a place to post what they have written. This is the first time I have actually ever written one though and thought I would share it with you (mainly because I am slacking on the blogging lately). Below is the prompt, followed by the 500-words-or-less story that I posted on the website's forum. Enjoy!

Writer’s Digest.com Writing Prompt- May 12, 2009

You've recently purchased a new house. Upon your first full night there, you begin to hear noises but think nothing of it—until you see something that convinces you the house is haunted. 

Please limit your response to 500 words or fewer.

The summer heat was unbearable. My clothes stuck to my skin and the constant water breaks made it excruciatingly difficult for me to get anything done on the first night in my new house. "Thank God the air conditioning is supposed to be fixed tomorrow," I sighed, looking at my dog Harry.

Hopeless and exhausted, I retired to the bedroom, but not before moving every portable fan in the house to my bedside. I cracked the windows and laid down to go to sleep, a thin sheet being all that I could bear in the stuffy heat.

"If someone broke in right now, how would I react?" The question I ask myself almost every night as I fall asleep- partially due to an unhealthy obsession with watching crime-related television dramas. Nonetheless, this is the same question that plagues me each night, the same question that rarely ever results in an actual answer. Instead, I occupy the majority of my thoughts going over details like, "Well, it depends, are they here for my stuff, or are they here for me?" and "It depends, am I asleep when I hear them outside my bedroom or do I awake with them standing over me?" All of these and more are the important questions that lay the platform for how the rest of my story turns out. As for the paranormal, I hardly waste my time wrestling with those thoughts- there is no way to fight a ghost, a feeling, or an unexplained act if you've never encountered one before.

Mid-way through my nightly ritual, right as my eyes began to droop and my body began to give into the heat, my eyes shot open at the sound of an unfamiliar noise outside my bedroom window.

My head was instantly flooded with thoughts of every possibility of what it could be, both good and bad. I locked eyes with the bedroom window and tried to remain positive, writing it off as normal house noises I had yet to become accustomed to. Then I remembered what the bedroom blinds were hiding, a window that I had opened to let the night breeze cool the bedroom while I slept. After which, only scenes from horror movies and ghost stories played in my head.

I started cursing myself for having so many fans on- while usually I welcome the soothing roar of a fan as I go to sleep, tonight it made it nearly impossible to discern what the rough rumbling noise outside my window may be. “I can’t make it out” I kept telling my ears as I strained to try and distinguish it, to recognize the sound, “Oh, please let me recognize the sound.”

Then I heard the same noise coming from within the house. I immediately focused on the light coming through the crack under my bedroom door to the hallway. No creepy shadows stopping at my door, that was a good sign. I got up from my bed, trying to move as silently as possible. I moved toward the door, wishing my dog was taking the noises as seriously I was. As I touched my hand to the door knob, my heart stopped. I heard the noise coming from within my bedroom and as I turned around a cool chill went down my spine and I smiled. The air conditioning was finally working. 

Read More

What married people do on the weekend...

We make headboards! (Well, I did at least)

Since we moved in, I have been consistently trying to make our apartment look more "home-y". I've been wanting a headboard for a while now, because I suspected it would really pull the room together and am fairly happy with the results. 

How I did it:

-4 pieces of wood - free! Husband's parents brought them up when they helped us move into the apartment back in August and they've just been sitting in my laundry room. 

- Old Twin size (I actually suspect it is a little kid size) mattress pad - $3 at Goodwill

- Chocolate brown twin size sheet (fitted) - $18 at Target (w/a pillow case and a flat sheet)

- Glue Gun, Nails, and Hammer - already had

- Total Price: $21

I think you can imagine how I did it, it has been on enough decorating shows to know. I was really frustrated when I got home though, because I couldn't figure out how I was going to do it- I was lacking in some important tools, but refused to make it an $80 project through going out and buying more stuff. But after arguing it out with the M (my Mother for those of you who call your mom's by more conventional names), I decided to use the glue gun I already had to put the pieces of wood together. Cross your fingers they will hold- ha ha. 

I also picked these vases up at Goodwill for .29 cents a piece- which I thought would help tie in the table to the green bambo rug below it (and apparently the green outside- the tree in the window looks awesome!). I had some small candles that I put in each of them- which will be really nice for all those dinner parties I host (ha ha).

Overall, I think my finds and craftiness today were money well spent for the effect they had on the rooms. My new headboard really makes the room look so... grown up (don't cry M). 

PS: Husband actually took some time to nail the mattress pad (used as the headboard cushioning) to the boards- I suspect he was thinking about law school exams as he hammered. 

Love and Junk

ANIB-SHO

Read More

A Chic Chick

6:30 PM... I walk through the door, grocery bag in hand.

"Why are you so late?" - Husband, obviously just waking up from a mini-nap

"Somebody told me to stop and get toilet paper before I came home," - Me, throwing the grocery bag of TP on the bed, "and traffic sucked."

"Why did it take so long?" - Husband

"I stopped by TJMaxx (next to the grocery store) to see if they had any polos on sale, which they did, but they were still asking too much than I wanted to---"

"WHY DID YOU BUY A NEW PURSE???" - Interupts Husband (Insert Bon Qui Qui "Rude!" statement here)

"I didn't!" - Me (convincingly innocent) "This is the same one I left the house with this morning. Remember, I was changing purses last night...."

"No. No. No. That is a new purse, you left the house this morning with a different tan one." - Husband (annoyingly observant)

"Yeah, you're right. I bought it at TJMaxx, I needed a nice tan one to go with work clothes." -Me

"You can't turn it [spending money] off, can you?" - Husband

"No. No, I can't. I have a problem. You should just take my debit card away from me." - Me, I have a problem.

"I know- I should. How much did it cost???" - Husband 

"I don't know, like $20 or something (or something)." - Me, knowing good and well the exact cost was $24 (and I assume if he reads this blog, he now knows too).

"Gah, Amber... you're the one that said 'No more spending anymore money'." - Husband

"Yeah, and I mean it (starting.... now.)." - Me

"Here.  Your Mom sent you something." - Husband, handing me a package

"Yay! She said she was going to send me something..." -Me, trying to open the very small package. "I meant to ask her if I am still entitled to an After-Tax-Season-Present even thought I don't live with them anymore. I could really use some new sharpies.... (my parents are accountants and we used to get a present after every tax season to make up for their career-over-family neglect during that time. Ultra Fine Point Sharpies, if you are reading this, Ma.)" - Me, still trying to open the package (!!)

"Well, you're not going to buy any new ones now..." - Husband

"Ha, ha, yeah, I know." - Me, finally looking inside the package (MOTHER- THAT PACKAGE WAS RIDICULOUSLY HARD TO GET OPENED! Go light on the tape next time, will ya?)

"AH! YAY!" - Me, pulling out of the package two clear yellow easter chicks (see photo) with $20 in each of them. 

"HAPPY EASTER JACOB!" - Me again, as I hand it one to Husband. 

"Awww... that was nice of them." - Husband

"Yeah! Purse money..." - Me

(picture: note the one labeled Amber no longer contains $20)

In all fairness, the me "spending money all the time" habits that Husband refers to includes things like groceries, rent, cable & internet, student loans, etc. This form of spending money Husband likes to classify under Me because I am the one that physically (writes and sends the checks) pays the bills. Why this is so, I will never know...

Read More

A Business Exchange

Do you like my new business card I made? Of course you do! At all of these events and meetings I have been going to lately, people pass out their business cards like bad advice (the clever answer Husband gave when I said, "what do people hand out a lot?"). I have a theory- you see, when I started working at my current job, they had to order me some business cards- minimum 1,000 cards. Who needs that many business cards (especially for work email-unless you are one of those peeps that goes to conferences and travels a lot-which is not me)?? Not I - I have decided people go to events just so they can get rid of these things. 

Of course, I am only kidding. I love business cards. They are so handy- it's easier to remember peoples' names with a business card (and by that, of course, I mean they are great because you don't actually have to remember the person's name because it's right there on the business card), it cuts down on those awkward "you can reach me at blah blah blah phone number/email" (which is what I was doing with my work card and just turning it over and writing my regular info on it), and it gives you another thing to judge a book on if not solely by its cover. I kid. I kid. I just needed another reason why business cards are great and I got distracted and forgot my other clever reasons. They are just great time-saving, handy-dandy little containers of self.  

Although I do love giving out my impressive work business card, I just didn't like giving out my work email and phone number for calls and emails I knew would be unrelated to work. So since I love designing business cards (a nerdy hobby of mine), I just decided to make a personal one as my weekend project. I actually got some of the design inspiration from one of my fellow college communication friends, Paula (we also went to high school together), who is fabulous and during a slow day in class she did something somewhat similiar with the larger letters. When I had them printed though, I was disappointed with the coloring and cutting. The color appeared darker when printed and the side and top trims were unevenly cut- but I still love them and nobody looks that closely to business cards, right? Either way.... Let me know what you think!

ANIB-SHO

Read More

Lawyers Lack Good Humor

Watching Boston Legal...

"That's the kind of lawyer I want to be!" laughed Husband (very happy and excited) watching Denny Crane act lovably crazy.

"Me too!" said Wife (me, very happy and excited too). "Can I be a lawyer too?"

"You can get me a Good Humor bar (strawberry shortcake ice cream bar).........Paralegal," said Husband.

"WHAT? You don't think I could be a good lawyer?" said Wife. 

"You have a really cute nose... I hope our kids get your nose," said Husband, trying to distract Wife from his previous comment. 

"You want our kids to look just like me. That's what you always say. What part of you would you like our kids to get from you? huh? huh? huh? what part, Husband?" the Wife said, raising her voice at what he would say or not-say-but-imply next (he thinks he is soooo much smarter than me). 

"I don't know..." Husband stalled, starting to smile because he knows Wife knows exactly what it is that he wants his kids to genetically inherit from him (the Brains). 

"Say it, Husband. Say it!" exclaimed Wife. 

Husband continues to deny knowing what Wife is talking about.

LIAR! It is true what they say about Lawyers... I don't want to be one anyway... (even though everyone says I should be one). 

Love and Junk

*Please Note: In all fairness, Husband did actually call me "Counselor" instead of "Paralegal" but I thought the story would be conveyed better the other way- because if you heard him say it, he did not mean "Counselor". Either way, he will pay. And paralegals probably actually do all the work anyway... Lawyers Shmawyers, they just sign the papers and play golf.*

Read More

Name That Tune

"Let's play 'Name that Tune'!" - Northerner 

"I suck at this game, I don't know singers or bands or names of songs, I have to sing the chorus just so people know what song I am referring to and even then I have troubles." - Me

Game progresses nonetheless. 

"Okay, your turn." -Northerner

Country music song starts to play...

(We're in Teams)

"Well, Amber? You know this one, c'mon..." -Northerner Team Mate

"What? Just because I am from Tennessee, you assume that I know the answer?" -Me

"Well, you are from Nashville. Isn't that, like, the Country Music Capital of the world?" - Northerner Non-Team Mate

"So, what? You think it's programmed into us?" - Me

"Well.... you tell us, is it?" -Northerner Team Mate

Time is running out...

Team is looking toward me hopefully...

Me, reluctantly, "I Try to Think About Elvis by Patty Loveless."

Team cheers, Everyone laughs, Northerners say their 'I told you SOs' 

"It's not fair, really. That's like the only one I would ever know and that's because it was so popular." -Me

"Mmmmhmmm..." - Northerners

"Northerners." - Me

Read More

Puppy Love and all that other stuff...

So blog posts don't come naturally to me- well, at least not as much as I would like them to. 

Valentine's Day was lovely.

Husband, much to my surprise, did very well. He is a notorious last minute gifter so unless I heavily hint (and by that I mean if I am saying it and I don't see him immediately pick up a pen and see him try to write it on his hand without me seeing him, then I can pretty much forget about it) and he usually doesn't go shopping for gifts until the day before or the day of- which usually means I know he is going to get me the last three things I mentioned I liked at Target- ha ha. (I'm not complaining though, he remembered, right?)

Well in true fashion, I had ordered him 3 books off Amazon weeks before (which he knew were coming because he knows he is going to get a book and thus checks the amazon account come gift time), but I was sneaky and also ordered him an embosser- which reads "From the Library of (Husband's Name Here)". I also bought tickets to the movie Taken from work ($3 off each ticket if I buy them through work) and filled my biggest purse up with store bought colas, popcorn, and candy so we could see the movie the way Husband likes to see it- on the cheap. And if you know me- I like to go to the movies a lot and I like the works- so skipping on the movie theatre popcorn was not an easy task. But Alas! He loved it and spent most of the free time we had the next few days embossing his books. 

In his true fashion, Husband woke up Valentine's Day and went shopping. I was kind of disappointed in him until he got back and (after not letting me see him) he had bought me three orange roses, which I loved, and managed to scour many different stores to find me my favorite Russell Stover's candy (the caramel collection- on a side note I basically said "don't come home without these" and since he never got me my chocolate birthday cake- I think he may have known it was a do or die situation). As I was getting ready to go out to eat (Olive Garden), Husband walked in the room holding a shirt I had pointed out in where else but Target. It was such a sweat jester. I was trying on my shirt when I heard Husband clanking around in the kitchen. When I inquired as to what he was doing in there, he just huffed and puffed and said, "I don't want to show you because it is supposed to be a surprise for later, but I don't know if I am doing this right." 

I knew it had to be food related.

So he let me peak/help and he had bought lots of strawberries and some Hershey chocolate bars to make chocolate covered strawberries. He also bought me some champagne because I had been saying for the last few weeks that I had a horrible craving for it. 

BUT THE BEST PART WAS OUR PUPPY LOVE (see video). No, I mean literally, what we gave our perfect puppy, Matlock, for Valentine's Day. Jacob distracted Matlock while I made a trail of treats leading from the bedroom to the kitchen and at the end was two yummy bones- which he is known to love-and a new bobo toy. Matlock didn't know what to do- he was so confused when he had to pick which one to get comfy with first. (PS: Forgive the messyness of my apartment- I was on strike that week, but eventually gave up because I couldn't stand it being so messy). ALSO- I tried tirelessly to rotate the video- but for some reason, blogger won't play it any way but sideways, so crank your neck or flip your computer screen on its side, ha ha. 

Really though, it was the best Valentine's day gesture Husband and I could do together because when I pitched the idea to him and he agreed whole-heartily and with as much excitement, it solidified our soul mateness... if he didn't love Matlock as much as I do, he just wouldn't be the one. 

Until next time... (which I promise will be sooner than later- I've been busy re-doing the voyageofaliikai.com website!)

ANIB-SHO

Read More

This isn't a list, technically.

Okay. Okay. I'm back. Geez, how long have you been waiting for a new post from me (Mom)?

Diet Determination and Dilemmas!

This week I started a diet. What Amber? You're so skinny, you don't need to go on a diet! (I wish people said that to me, but instead they just look back at me like tell me more about the diet you are going on- bahumbug). I really just want to feel healthier more than anything and I have a huge binge-eating problem on the weekends and wanted to get out of that routine. I estimated that I was eating well over the 2,000 calorie mark a day- so it is amazing I have not ballooned. Right now, I am just counting calories and eating healthy. How healthy?

Breakfast- Special K Red Berries Cereal with Skim Milk and OJ..... 340 calories (OJ has a lot more calories than you think)

Lunch- Salads, lately, and the calories vary, but I googled and it estimated around 300 calories. 

Dinner- varies, but I just cooked some Weight Watcher soup-FROM SCRATCH- last night (with Husband) and will be eating that every other

 meal or so- I have about two servings of it and it is usually around 80 calories per serving, plus 5 crackers (60 calories). It is so yummy for such little calorie count.

Then there are the snacks- which I haven't been doing much of lately, and when I do it is usually a 100 calorie snack once a day. 

Let me tell you, going from well over 2,000 calories a day to 1,500 calories or lower a day is not easy. I haven't really felt like I am giving up anything I love yet- but the first day, I thought I was going to pass out from hunger (or from grouchiness). And my coworkers have a bad habit of bringing in yummies for everyone (at least twice a week someone brings in something) and it has been awful turning them down. 

Exercising? Not a chance- well, not yet at least- baby steps, baby steps. Before and After Pictures to come (pending of course, ha ha)...don't worry, they will be PG. 

Nancy Drew! The Mystery of the Husband's Disdain

I got a package (see other story below) on Monday and what could it be? A box of 12 or so Nancy Drew-Vintage-books to add to my collection, which coincidentally wasn't considered a collection in my mind until I received the package. I already had 10 or so and want to expand for as long as I can. I love them and Nancy Drew in general and my mother was kind enough to send them to me. Thanks Ma! Husband hates my collection- maybe he thinks they are childish, maybe he thinks I am never going to read them all, or maybe he is just... jealous. I think we all know which one it is. Don't hate, appreciate!

Speaking of Husband...

As the super bowl was approaching, previews for one of me and Husband's favorite shows, "Chuck", was advertising their Monday night special 3-D episode. I was determined to get us our 3-D glasses and was elated when the woman at target still had some left (she laughed when I asked for them). Any who... here is a beautiful picture of Husband and I watching Chuck in 3-D- Oh wait! But what? This picture was staged! Husband would not watch the show with his 3-D glasses on! I was offended and somewhat appalled that I had married someone who would not partake in such a joyous and fun experience with me- but alas, i will get my payback- tune in tomorrow night when I expose one of his secrets! 

Package Hater

I'm just going to jump right into it- the man who works the front counter in my apartment building (the concierge is what they call him) clearly dislikes me/thinks I am running an illegal business from my apartment. 

To explain a little further, I get packages a lot (to those who send them- i love you for it, it is one of my favorite things in the whole wide world- that and letters in the mail- but who doesn't?). And while he has never warmed to my "hello, how ya doin?"s,  I have forgiven him- not everyone is as friendly. Today though, I looked online and the postal service had tracked the package and said it had been delivered to my apartment. Usually I get a sticky on my mailbox or a note under my door telling me to come pick it up, but lately I haven't been getting them. I trotted downstairs and told him the tracking number said it had been delivered and he just looked at me blankly and said, "No." 

There were packages surrounding the man, and he didn't even glance to see if he had missed one. So I am assuming one of two things at this time- 1. He is holding each package a few days after he gets them just to spite me or 2. He thinks because I am getting so many packages that I must be doing something illegal and is holding them each time for the FBI to look over them first. Either way, I want my packages!

K. Enough Now. Tomorrow's will be better, this I can promise you. Love and Junk,

ANIB-SHO

PS: The picture below is for all the lovers out there... the sun never sets on the cool.

Read More

Borders Bookstore Politics

I was on my lunch break, hanging around Borders bookstore and browsing the magazine stands with all the other moochers and picked up an edition of The Weekly Standard that featured an interesting cover. On the front it portrayed certain democrats in a circus scene, including Hillary Clinton. 

When I went to the front counter to purchase my items, the woman ringing me up let out a very disapproving "Oh!" when she saw the portrayal of Clinton. 

"That's my daughters new boss!" she said to me (at this time it was obvious she just wanted to brag, which, as a Mother, is her right).

"Oh! Well, great for her," I responded, very supportive/nice-ly. 

"Yes, she is a foreign diplomat in Mumbai." By this time, she was beaming with pride. 

"Oh, so just a few more days then," I said, referring to the count-down until the new administration takes over.

"No!" the woman exclaimed, looking at me like I was an idiot. She pointed to the picture of Clinton again, "She is going to be the next Secretary of State!"

"Yes, I know. Just a few more days until she takes office," I responded, looking confused why she was looking back at me like I was crazy (We are saying the same thing woman!). 

The conversation died down as she rung (rang? ringed? that's a whole other blog topic) up my magazines.

"Well, I just think women make better diplomats," she started up again. 

"Hmmm," I said, being polite and acknowledging her comment (It was a very nice 'hmm' too!)

"Well, that's just my opinion," she said (looking at me like my conservative magazine preferences somehow also made me automatically disagree with whatever opinion she holds)

Feeling her getting defensive, I laughed and said, "Well, I wouldn't know. I don't know any diplomats." HA HA. 

"Well I gave birth to one!" she cried out. I think she wanted to fight and since I don't make a habit of fighting women twice my age, I gracefully bowed out and said, "You win."

Not really, but honestly, I wasn't trying to compete with her, I just wanted to buy some magazines.

Anywho, once again, life would be so boring without politics. 

G'day

Read More

Everybody Loves Lists!

So here is my list of things to talk about:

1. Want to hear what the book I am writing is about? Too bad. It's a secret....unfortunately, even to me.

2. I listened to the book Sundays at Tiffany's on the drive back to NOVA (12 hours!) and I have to say, it really makes me angry when they say the character looks like one thing in the book and then they put a completely different figure on the cover! The main character is known for her bubbly blondeness and on the cover she has black curly hair. Argh! Maybe I am just mad because the blondes got slighted once again...

4. Amy (Husband's cousin's wife) and I started a little competition this break- it involves the race to procreate first (see spaghetti picture label)- I was only kidding, but alas! two days later (today), I get a call informing me of her victory. But you are a cheater Amy! Yeah, I said it. A cheater! She had a headstart and therefore the competition was null from the beginning! Luckily, I wasn't serious about the competition, yay for Amy! As for me, I have six or so more years ahead...

5. Today I failed my new year's resolution, which was to only spend $125-$150 on groceries, beauty products, etc. a month. As a part of my plan, I purchased a membership to BJs wholesale club (a Sam's Club type deal). I spent $216 while I was there, which still isn't bad for supplies for the entire month, but I thought Husband was going to faint when he saw the bill. Faint away Husband! Atleast I'm trying... The flaw in this plan is that since we buy in bulk now, we have a lot less variety in our meals. I'm thinking Taco Tuesdays, Sgetti Saturdays, Sporkchop Sundays? Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Whatever, I stink at new year's resolutions (but who doesn't?). PS: On my club card, I look like a crack-addicted possessed woman...not attractive, but still no different from the look I get when someone tells me to get out of bed in the morning.

6. Everyone misses me already... check my facebook wall, it's documented (and true). ( I have to brag about this, I have no friends here!) On a side note: I miss everyone too! 

7. At lunch today, some of my coworkers made fun of younger guys wearing sweaters or blazers with elbow patches. I firmly stood my ground that elbow patches can be sexy. Sadly, I was out numbered. Am I wrong about this? Either way, I married an elbow-patch kinda guy (Husband, in case you were wondering what his name was), and I've never seen him look better than when he is sporting the "professor" look. In case you are wondering, yes, I also think fondly of argyle sweaters. 

8. Hmmm... I really need a soap box item.... it wouldn't be a blog without a soap box item....what to get on my soap box about.... hmmm... oh! how about this!? Sometimes when people find out I am married, they say things like "You're married? I can't believe that. I guess I just like to do what I want, with who I want, when I want," to which I want to say back, "that is what I am doing...mine just happens to be with the same person (ignorance!)" Pshhh.

9. (Can) you (count) how (many) times (I) have (used) parenthesis (in) this (blog) entry(?)

10. Better question, where did #3 go? I'm not telling...

11. I am currently the new "webmaster" for my friend Boggs' website- actually the website of the Aliikai crew- (my friend who is sailing around the world for 18 months). It still has a lot more pages to add and little fixes to work out, but if you want to see a rough draft the website is www.voyageofaliikai.com. 

12. Every morning I watch Fox and Friends in the Morning and since the election is over, the hosts have been looking for a new slogan. I submitted my suggestion today (they are taking suggestions as jokes) and I completely ripped it from my (x)sorority's slogan. Anywho... listen for it every morning! My suggestion was "Fox and Friends, the First and Finest in News". I bet I win. 

Until next time... love and junk.

ANIB-SHO 

Read More